I've always had a hard time being patient...

I know that there are physical reasons why we can't have biological children, but I've often wondered what the spiritual reasons (if any) are. One thing instantly pops into my mind every time someone ask's me how long we 'waited' for our girls... we had to be patient, and we had to endure. We started fertility treatments in 2002 and were placed with Bug 2006, we moved, lost jobs, went back to school and started from scrated after that and were placed with Boo late 2009. So that's 7 (almost 8) years of family building for 2 (adorable) children. When if we could of we would of spaced our kids around 2 years apart and we could of had FOUR kids by now... crazy. Was it worth it, yes my girls are adorable and wonderful. Was it hard YES! I'm so glad that we had such positive outcomes with our two adoptions.

I have to admit it still stings a little when I hear of a friend or family member that is expecting a baby biologically. I do want that, but Heavenly father had other 'things' planned for me. On another note, living in the hub of Mormon culture it is SO HARD being infertile, being a working mother, being me. Thankfully, I have a loving husband that is so PATIENT with me :) Another gift The Artist has that I don't.

Below are some excerps from Dieter F. Uchtdorf's talk Continue in Patience. That hit really close to my heart, infact a lot of it is a sure shot deep into me.

"Patience—the ability to put our desires on hold for a time—is a precious and rare virtue. We want what we want, and we want it now. Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter....

Patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed....

Every one of us is called to wait in our own way. We wait for answers to prayers. We wait for things which at the time may appear so right and so good to us that we can’t possibly imagine why Heavenly Father would delay the answer....Often the deep valleys of our present will be understood only by looking back on them from the mountains of our future experience. Often we can’t see the Lord’s hand in our lives until long after trials have passed. Often the most difficult times of our lives are essential building blocks that form the foundation of our character and pave the way to future opportunity, understanding, and happiness."

("Then by Chains" Graphite on Paper 18"x24")

Waiting for my girls was a trial and it really taught me patients and how to endure trials by working and hoping and keeping a positive outlook on the earthly unknowns in life. Now that our family is complete (for now) my patients is being attacked again... The Artist applied for a job! But.... so did 80 other applicants. I know that even if he doesn't get this job, things will work out we will just keeping doing what we are doing, but my heart just beats a little (ok a lot) harder when I think of the possibilities that my eventuallys in life might become a little closer than we think. So I am praying tonight that the individuals who interviewed The Artist today will be touched by my great patients and HIRE HIM :)